"More Than Words"

All you have to do is close your eyes
And just reach out your hands and touch me
Hold me close don't ever let me go

Earlier in the evening, I went walking and found myself pondering my relationship with others. My mind wandered from my friends to my family and back and forth. I found myself in a familiar state of mind, thinking the kind of thoughts that people tell you, either because it's the "appropriate" answer or because they are genuinely concerned, "don't think that way": The thought that my significance in others' lives is not significant at all; that I wouldn't be terribly missed.
Now, in the few discussions in which this subject came up, I've always been told that I would be missed. Okay, so perhaps I'm a bit drastic when I say nobody would miss me. Realistically, there would be a handful of people who would genuinely miss me, even cry because I was gone and, perhaps, even attend my funeral.
However, I often feel I play a secondary role and often a tertiary one in the lives of others. I only come to prominence when I'm needed; when my skills (or, more often, my things) are key to their success. Not that I feel used. In fact, it makes me happy to aid and to serve those whom I care about.
Why is that? Mostly, it's because I enjoy making others happy. In effect, it is also because I don't like to see those I care about unhappy or unwell when I have the ability to prevent it. Another, somewhat secret, reason I do so is because, in that time that my skills or affects are needed, so I too am needed.
I have been living off the thanks of others for my services... but their gratitude often feels like scraps of the love and affection I so crave. I've been living off these scraps and each bit reminds of what it's like to be loved. I say it this way because it has been a long time since anyone has considered me an important aspect in their present. In fact, I can't remember the last time I was hugged (besides in ritual greeting or parting) or the last time anyone told me they loved me. (It's funny; I realized this long ago, but as I'm writing it right now, I find myself tearing as if it were a recent realization). I do remember the last time anyone kissed me... that was two and a half years ago.
However long it's been since I've received any of the aforementioned "gifts", that's how long it's been since I've done these actions myself. In all honesty though, I don't feel like I'm allowed to. It's foolish, I know, but it seems that I take such an insignificant position in people's lives that it would be awkward. Awkward to have someone ranked so lowly (in my mind, at least) tell them they love them, be it verbally or in the form of a hug.
These were the thoughts I had while walking earlier. When I got home, maybe it was an hour or so ago, I sat on my couch and stared out into space, my thoughts drifting. Drifting towards thoughts of my hopelessness towards a romantic relationship for myself. A thought came to mind. Again, something I've thought of before but I don't believe I've ever written it down. All the thoughts of not being told I was loved since forever came together to form something of a credo; a view on love I've never voiced before.

I know there are some that read my blog. It is for you them that the next section has been written as a sort of monologue to performed or recited for an audience:

As we live our lives, coming into contact with all manners of people, we develop our own ideas and opinions concerning the people we interact with the most. There are a select handful that you will find yourself, in one way or another, Loving. However, there is a fair chance that you will develop a feeling so unique and powerful towards a single significant other person, that you'll know you want nothing more than to devote your life towards Loving them and whatever that might entail. If you happen to find yourself in this situation, I ask only these things of you:
If you Love them, tell them. Say the words "I Love you". If you Love them, show them. Let them see your Love in your actions.
Say "I Love you" because you it's true; do not let it fall merely into routine and routine only. Say "I Love you" because they need to hear it; if you don't believe me, look into their eyes when you say it. If you are sincere, even before they can respond with words, their eyes will tell you that those were the words they wanted to hear; the words they needed to hear. Say "I Love you" because you can. Never forget that of all the people in all the world, the person who stands before you stands faithfully by your side when they could have chosen anybody else.
Show them your Love to exhibit that your words are not hollow. Show them your Love because words, as powerful as they can be, can only say so much by themselves. Show them your Love because, of all the people in all the world, the person who stands before you stands faithfully by your side when they could have chosen anybody else.
Never forget that it is an honor to be able to say these words with sincerity to another. If you are given such an honor, consider your luck and know that there are those in this world who are not so lucky; those who wish they could tell another that they Love them and not worry that the feeling might not be reciprocated. Think of them and and the luck which you've happened upon.
And once you've got it, never let it go.